Posts

Teaching Our Kids About Intimacy

One thing that I've learned growing up in more of a conservative and religious culture, is that the topic of sexual intimacy is rarely discussed.  Despite having my mom teach me about puberty once the night before the maturation clinic in the fifth grade, and barely even getting "the talk" when we found out my cousin got pregnant out of wedlock, all I was taught was not to do it.  Even growing up I tried to shy away from these conversations with my parents.  I mean, who wants to talk about that as a kid with their parents?  I figured I'd just figure it all out when the time came.  As I've gotten older, I realized I hadn't had that much exposure to sex ed growing up, and realized I had lots to learn on my own.  I've heard countless of horror stories of couples on their wedding night who were uncomfortable with each other and themselves, and just didn't have the preparation and education that was necessary. After hearing so many experiences and seeing th...
Post a Comment
Read more

Validating Emotions

Something that I've learned when working with kids is that they are learning so much and have big emotions, and often don't know how to handle these emotions.  Even as adults and caretakers, I've found it's hard to handle it when these kids have big emotions as well.  Something that is so very important in helping kids understand and handle their emotions is to validate them.  How often do we tell our kids (or even think to them) just to "get over it" or "stop crying?"  This can cause them to feel like what they are feeling isn't valid or okay, and in turn hide their feelings, creating further issues emotionally for them down the road.  It isn't always the easiest to relate to problems our kids might be having, but there are definitely ways to validate their feelings.  When we do find ourselves becoming frustrated and wanting to react in a harsh way, we can remember there are alternate ways to respond, such as the following examples we learne...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Importance and Benefits of Guiding Children Without Harsh Discipline

Often, I'm sure we find ourselves in moments of frustration with our kids.  In those moments, how do we react?  Do we find ourselves having patiences with our children and taking time to check in with them about the situation?  Or do we react with harsh discipline?  In the book,  10 Basic Principles of Good Parenting  by Dr. Laurence Steinberg, we learn of 4 basic principles to avoid harsh discipline.  These include: Never use physical punishment. Don't be verbally abusive. Controlling your anger. The right way to punish. Dr. Steinberg explains in his book, " Of all the forms of punishment that parents use, the one with the worst side effects is physical punishment. Physical punishment is no more effective than other types of punishment-in fact, in many situations it is less effective-and it has been proven to have a harmful effect on children's development. That's why you should never spank, hit, slap, or otherwise physically punish your child." ...
Post a Comment
Read more